Thursday, February 24, 2011

I'm gonna git you, sucka!

We had a mouse. Yes, one mouse.

It was like Mrs. Frisby and the freakin' rats of Nihm, this mouse.

We're not really sure how Mr. Mouse got in. In all the years we've lived here (8), and even when it was abandoned, there has never been a mouse problem. (Give thanks to really high basement walls. Hallelu!) Until this year. We had one in spring. Killed it. No prob. Got another one some time this winter, and the thing just wouldn't. die.

It liked butter, this new mouse. Liked to leave tiny little paws prints in my butter. It would lick knives that had been left on the counter with a residue of butter. Or sometimes peanut butter. But not bread. Not crackers. Not any of the millions of different types of crumbs we have littering our floor. No. This mouse had special tastes. And special skills.

I discovered this mouse fairly recently, when I noticed mouse droppings amongst my pot holders and oven mitts. Really? Ooh. Gross! Apparently it makes for a cozy bed, this drawer. And I also noticed the paw marks in my butter. So I got out the trap. I had one snap trap left from Mr. Spring Mouse. The plastic kind of snap trap. Killed that mouse just fine. But, Oh No. Not this mouse. This mouse.. *shakes head*

This mouse




And I do mean clean.

I would put peanut butter. I would put butter. I would put peanut butter mixed with butter. I would fill up that little well in the middle, and the sucker would just taunt me, licking it clean every. single. time.

A friend suggested sticky traps. So I got sticky traps. But they contain no butter. So why in all that is holy would the darned mouse walk on one of those things? I noticed that, again, like the other mouse, it liked to frolic in our dirty laundry baskets, leaving evidence of it's presence.

Again. Gross.

At least it was dirty laundry.

I caught that other mouse trying to sneak into the laundry basket, but this mouse didn't fall for that trap. (haha. get it? trap? hehe. Ok, moving on.) My boys managed to stick a foot in and drag that crap all over. The mouse? He just kept on truckin'. I did find evidence of mouse on one of the sticky traps I left out. A little tuft of fur. I just shook my head.

Then I saw Mr. Mouse. He had big cute ears. I came into the kitchen one night and was surprised to see him scamper across the back splash to behind the microwave, and then disappeared from there. This then became a regular occurrence. One night, as I was walking the baby, I came into the kitchen slowly. Mr Mouse had really started to develop some cojones and was coming out with the lights on! We had ourselves a little stare down, that evening. Me standing in the doorway. He standing next to the toaster. And we just stared at each other. After a while, I went to get the camera. He kept meandering the counter top. I came back. He looked around, and slowly went back into hiding. This is just making me mad, now. In looking at this lame-O plastic trap, I see that the reservoir where you put the "treat" is not where the trap is activated. No, the mouse has to lean waaaaay into the trap, not stepping on the lever, and lick it clean that way. So I set the trap wiping the butter on the "trigger", so to speak. Nope. My mouse is too dang smart for that. Still licked it clean. Kong says, "get some old fashioned wood traps." So we did. I just about snapped my fingers off trying to set one. The package says "No bait needed." I'm sorry, but a flat piece of plastic cut out in the shape of cheese is NOT GOING TO GET MY MOUSE. Do these people think my mouse is dumb? Apparently. News flash: he's NOT. He licked the plastic trap clean, and the wooden one half clean. Must have been feeling a little cautious that day.

Last night, as we were preparing for bed, I asked Kong if he wanted to set the trap. Sure, he says. But... hahaha. He busted out his Tim the Tool Man Taylor vibe and did a little "augmentation" of said trap in hopes of making it more sensitive. In fact, he almost altered it a little too well because he then had a hard time setting it.

Fast forward to 3AM when I had to make a trip to the bathroom. Of coarse, curiosity killed the cat the mouse got the better of me and I turned on the light to check. Yep. WE WON! Victory! Big fat furry body littering my counter. That poor mouse couldn't have so much as breathed on that trap and WHAM-O! Right on the schnoz. He didn't have a chaaance. Not even one little lick.

Ha ha! That outta teach ya. Don't mess with the Monkey's. We're gonna git you, sucka!

Kong did his own inspection this morning, pleased for his, erm, hunting and gathering skills. *snort* He also collected the specimen by putting it in a plastic grocery bag and chucking it on the front steps. I couldn't just leave it there, though. The kids had to see it. They were all very interested, and spent a good chunk of time inspecting it, "but no touching. Dead things carry germs," Koko informs us. (Good girl!) Cheeks woke up later, and also checked it out, but was much less interested. After about 30 seconds she said, "Ok, now get that dead thing outta here."

Haha. Ok, dear. Will do with gladness.


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