Pucker up. Watch for slime.

I got this as a gift ?last year. I told a friend that I didn't think I had ever seen mistletoe, and so as a kind of joke she got this for me. I thought it was funny. Then I read the package. This just isn't your ordinary, run of the mill mistletoe.

It's "Grow Your Own" Mistletoe. What's not to like about that?

The second thing of note is how it's a "great way to get that holiday smooch you've been hoping for." 

This will be funnier later.

It's also interesting to know that it grows to 600% of it's size. So how big is that exactly? (For the record, mine didn't grow that big, but maybe it's because it's a year old.)

Thirdly, "As your toy grows it may distort in shape. This is part of the fun." Really? So now, it's large, soggy, and distorted. Let's not forget fun! Good, distorted fun. Ahhh....

Finally, the part that kills me... "The slimy, icky, texture is normal and harmless."

Did they really just put "icky" in there??? 

So now this Grow Your Own Mistletoe is large, soggy, distorted, slimy and icky. And of coarse harmless and fun. Good stuff!

What I haven't quite figured out yet is... how do you hang it? Remember, it's slimy. And do I really want to risk standing under it? Makes ya wanna reach out and smooch somebody with all that slimy, icky-ness, huh?

**Thanks to P for this humorous gift. I have giggled a lot.